Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Daily DIC: Crisis of Faith

"wake up everybody no more sleepin in bed/no more backward thinkin time for thinkin ahead..."--Teddy Pendergrass

Guido Marini: [hissing under his breath] Pope! Pope Benedict!!

The Pope remains motionless.

Guido Marini: Are you praying?

The Pope remains in the same position.

Guido Marini: Or are you sleeping? Oh my Father in Heaven, you are sleeping. [does the sign of the cross in a small motion] I told them you were too old and too frail for this position; did they listen? No, they did not listen. For some reason, you have risen to power and I cannot understand why. Anyone else should be Pope-I should be Pope! When the Nazi story came out, I thought for sure you were going to be tossed out, but no...you managed to survive! God, everything you say is stupid, everything you do is ridiculous and still you are Pope! I'll tell you what--you might not believe me, but I hear from God, too. That's right Benny I don't have to speak to him through you; I speak to him myself! And you know what He told me? That you are no prophet. In fact, sometimes I think you are Satan himself!

The man next to Guido pokes him to quiet down.

Man: Guido, you're getting hysterical. Just poke him like we always do.

Guido: [nearly in tears; to Pope] One day...you mark my words: one of these days!

1 comment:

BIC2 said...

LOL!!! Hilarity!!!