Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Daily DIC: Don't Put Your Hands On Me

"baby you can yell/scream/blow off some steam/but don't put your hands on me..." --Keke Wyatt

It's sad that I had two options for Daily DIC today and they both involved the senseless abuse of women. There was, of course, Chris Brown, whom if reports are correct left Rihanna with a bloody nose, a serious contusion, and bite marks. I can't even picture that going down, but apparently it did. Then, I log onto Feministing.com to discover that some jerkoffs in India kicked in the door of a local pub waving the four-four [not literally] and beat the daylights out of the women in the joint they felt were "drinking freely" and/or "exhibiting obscene behavior". WTF? Um, India, is that cool? And moreover, since I missed the opportunity last week to report on a man who stabbed his ex-girlfriend in an effort to cut out the breast implants he paid for, I'm prompted to ask a question: what's good? And where is the m%*&$*#@^!?@g love? Semi-rant after the jump.

It's no secret that mama is on a man fast. I hate calling it a man fast because it's not really anything structured; it's just me taking a breather to catch my breath (was that redundant?). So, I don't want people to start thinking I'm down on men; I'm not. There are amazing men out there, just as there are great and not-so-great women. But honestly, no matter how much of a feminist you are and how much you herald equality between men and women, it's simple science to know that men are bigger and stronger and more muscular than women. So, I need to know why, in 2009, it seems to be becoming somewhat mainstream to attack women physically.

I thought we took care of this years ago. It's not 1950, and no woman should be standing in the door hesitating over the question "do you want to press charges ma'am?" Does there need to be a refresher in our lesson that it's never, ever, ever okay to put your hands on a woman in any way? DIC or no, physical violence is totally unacceptable--beating, slapping, grabbing, pushing, pulling, choking, biting--all forbidden. Verbal abuse is more subjective, and poor treatment is not okay. But in the long run I do believe that most women are stronger than that. Standing for verbal abuse is something I can't relate to, although I know that both men and women alike fall victim to it. But actually using your hands, your fists, your body, your teeth to hurt a woman is some sick mess I just can't fathom. Whether a woman is drinking, being publicly obscene, cheating on you, calling you out of your name, getting smart with you, resisting having sex, didn't cook dinner, slapped your face, cut up your clothes, keyed your car, called your mama a ho and cussed you out--it's not okay for a man to put his hands on a woman. Maybe men need to relearn the art of walking away. Whatever it is, it needs to be done quickly, or handgun and grits sales are going to rise exponentially. Women are reactors and where there's DIC, there will eventually be BIC. And that's real.

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